New College Degree Program

A few Colleges and Universities around the country are starting in on a new trend that I think is marvelous. They have a new two-year degree program only for men called: Becoming a Real Man. That's right, in just six trimesters, some pathetic guys can earn an MA (Male Arts) degree and become real men! Please take a moment to look over the course schedule and program outline to see if you or someone you know could benefit.


FIRST YEAR

Autumn Schedule
MEN 101 - Combating Stupidity
MEN 102 - You, too, Can Do Housework
MEN 103 - PMS - Learn When to Keep Your Mouth Shut
MEN 104 - Sleazy Underthings Are Not Good Christmas Gifts

Winter Schedule
MEN 110 - Wonderful Laundry Techniques
MEN 111 - Understanding the Female Response to Getting Home at 4:00AM
MEN 112 - Parenting: It doesn't End With Conception
EAT 100 - Get a Life, Learn to Cook
EAT 101 - Get a life, Learn to Cook II
ECON 001A - What's Her's is Her's

Spring Schedule
MEN 120 - How NOT to Act Like a Buttface When You Are Wrong
MEN 121 - Understanding Your Incompetence
MEN 122 - YOU, the Weaker Sex
ECON 001C - What Was Your's is Her's

SECOND YEAR

Fall Schedule
SEX 101 - You CAN Fall Asleep Without It
SEX 102 - Morning Dilemma: If It's Awake, Take a Shower
SEX 103 - Staying Awake After Sex
MEN 201 - How To Put the Toilet Seat Down

Winter Schedule
MEN 210 - The Remote Control: Overcoming Your Dependency
MEN 211 - How to Not Act Younger than Your Children
MEN 212 - You, too, Can Be the Designated Driver
MEN 213 - Believe Me, You Don't Look Like Tom Cruise
MEN 230A - Her Birthdays and Anniversaries Are Still Important I

Spring Schedule
MEN 220 - Omitting 'Bitch' and 'Fuck' From Your Vocabulary (Pass/Fail)
MEN 221 - Her Birthdays and Anniversaries Are Still Important II
MEN222 - Real Men Ask Directions
MEN 223/SEX 204 - Thirty Minutes of Begging is NOT Considered Foreplay


Course Electives
EAT 102 - Utilizing Utensils
EAT 201 - Cooking Healthy with Tofu
EAT 204 - Burping and Belching Discreetly
MEN 231 - Mothers-in-Law
MEN 232 - How to Appear to Be Listening
MEN 233 - Just Say "Yes Dear"
ECON 001D - Cheaper to Keep Her


For some - this program is a must. For others - it is highly recommended. For most - it will go undiscovered, and the divorce rate, coupled with the number of single parent children, will continue to grow. C'mon guys, let's step up to the plate. Become a real man.

Consult your local college/university to see if this degree is being offered. It can also be tailored for guys that are living with/married to a pregnant girlfriend/wife.




Peace out bitches.....water, tylenol, egg-white omelet, and 2% milk.... here I come!